Wordgag ๐ŸŽ…

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ฐ has copied:

It takes so much energy to go inside a Walmart.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ง has copied:

Growing up means choosing cozy couch moments over crowded club scenes. Cheers to adulting!

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฉ has downloaded:

Kids: making things way more difficult when they don’t have to be, since the dawn of man.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has downloaded:

The horror: โ€œCome on, Iโ€™ll introduce you to everyone.”

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ป has shared:

I love when men go on diets they will be like “let me go for the healthy option”: the buffalo chicken quesadilla.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has viewed:

Your opinions are not my business.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ช has bookmarked:

All kids are born with a sixth sense that lets them know the absolute worst time to ask for something.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ณ has copied:

Roses are pink. I need a drink.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ซ๐Ÿ‡ฎ has copied:

I made a smoothie that needs a spoon.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ป has bookmarked:

It’s funny how quickly you become difficult if you don’t always just say “yes”.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,780

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Just shared via Snapchat:

Beer is Narcan for when you overdose on Microsoft Teams.

Spotted on Threads:

They wonโ€™t teach you this in school, but life is all about going to weird little diners.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I didn’t buy that thing I wanted but didn’t need, so I celebrated by buying a different thing I wanted but didn’t need.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

You ever have one of those days that require the use of both of your middle fingers?

Just shared via Slack:

I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

“No idea” doesn’t mean I don’t know the answer. I just don’t want to have a conversation.

Spotted on Threads:

Ancestors survived five mass extinctions on earth for me to be killed by a house cat I was trying to put a Christmas sweater on.

Freshly posted on X:

I wish I was waking up and going to the airport.

Breaking via Twitch:

I really miss kissing. I hope next year favors my lips.

Going viral on Twitch:

Some people exercise every day. Right now, I’m watching a show I don’t like because the remote fell on the floor.

More funny quotes ๐Ÿ‘‡

๐ŸŽฒ Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŒ๏ธ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ฅ

๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ…๐ŸŽ„ Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars โญ

65 shares on Instagram this month:

Drivers seem to underestimate how willing I am to get knocked down at a zebra crossing to prove a point.

86 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I can keep my mouth shut, but you can read the subtitles on my face.

27 shares on Slack this month:

This body is a temple; I suicide bomb every day.

76 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If you want to hang out with me, all you have to do is ask, and I’ll say no.

17 shares on Telegram this month:

Today my coworker asked if I wanted to hold her new baby and neither of us were prepared for me saying why?

86 shares on Snapchat this month:

Never skip the footnotes โ€“ itโ€™s here you find out who made the author angry enough to write the article.

25 shares on Threads this month:

Have you ever just restarted the dryer because you didnโ€™t feel like folding the clothes yet?

50 shares on TikTok this month:

Everyoneโ€™s a gangster until itโ€™s time to pronounce Worcestershire Sauce.

79 shares on Snapchat this month:

A two-step guide to warning someone not to hit their head: 1. Wait until theyโ€™ve hit their head. 2. Say โ€œOoh, mind your head!โ€

85 shares on TikTok this month:

I swear the air gets heavier around 6 p.m. on Sundays. You can feel the Microsoft Teams energy approaching.

Trending Topics ๐Ÿ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes ๐Ÿ’ฅ

24 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Take your days off, these jobs don’t care about you.

22 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Just another day of not being hot and rich.

7 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

If you pretend you’re erasing the evidence of a murder while cleaning the bathroom, you’ll do a better job, and it actually becomes fun!

22 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

If you lift the cat off the couch and it sounds like Velcro, then it didn’t want to leave.

14 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

My husband is the do-it-yourself type. I asked him to take out the garbage and he said, “do it yourself.”

12 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

King Kong shouldโ€™ve been able to find a better place to hide than the top of the tallest building in the middle of New York City.

7 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

I shaved my legs today and it was the fastest 3lbs Iโ€™ve ever lost in my life.

20 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Millennials arenโ€™t having kids because no oneโ€™s made lo-fi hip-hop beats to yell at your kids to.

17 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

We need a Disney princess whoโ€™s a greedy profiteer, so we can cheer for the poison apple.

21 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Acceptance truly begins when you ask Alexa to play classic rock and she plays a song that came out when you were in high school.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,739

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡พ has shared:

Sorry, I ghosted you. I liked you too much.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฌ has viewed:

I’m not starting a presentation with “ladies and gentlemen”, I’m using the gender neutral “to those who heed my warnings”.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฎ has viewed:

All Iโ€™m saying is, there are too many songs about love and not enough songs about evenly layered nachos.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฉ has copied:

You can be anything. Be the person who ends the meeting early.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡พ has copied:

Sometimes I feel like Iโ€™m cheating on my recliner with my loveseat, in case you were wondering how emotionally invested I am in laziness.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฒ has downloaded:

โ€œYou changed!โ€ Yeah, I thought three days in the same outfit was kinda pushing it.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ช has copied:

Imagine Pinocchio roasting you for 5 mins straight and his nose didnโ€™t move an inch.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡บ has copied:

All women want is to consistently annoy one handsome man forever.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฌ has bookmarked:

I found a box of VHS tapes. I’m a bit nervous about the one that has the label torn off.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has viewed:

I like to push myself out of my comfort zone by sometimes sitting on the other end of my sofa.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Just shared via TikTok:

Is 27 a good age to leave everything you know and love, and start over?

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I hate when I get ready too quickly and have to sit on the couch, fully dressed, and wait like an idiot.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Chuck Norris got shot. The bullet is in critical condition.

Breaking via Facebook:

Note: Press the button on the elevator as often as possible to activate the secret express function and speed up the thing.

Going viral on Threads:

Unsolicited sandwich pics.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Just peed so much that a little laugh came out.

Going viral on Pinterest:

The biggest first-world problem is having your favorite makeup product be discontinued.

Spotted on WeChat:

When the past calls, don’t answer it. It has nothing new to tell you.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Being an adult is like folding a fitted sheet.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I always fear that one day I will enter my house and find a thief, knocked out unconscious by the things fallen on his head from some closet.

ยฉ 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with โค๏ธ in Sydney โ˜€๏ธ๐ŸŒด