16 Funny allowed quotes

• 

  3 weeks ago

  Share →: Sorry for bouncing my leg. I’m not allowed to bash my head into the walls anymore.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like my leg's a drum soloist while my head's on a 'no headbanging' contract! 🥁😅 #LegLife"

• 

  4 weeks ago

  Share →: People who work in customer service should be allowed to fight one customer a day. Two on Fridays.

  …

  Commentary:
  "Finally, a way to end the week with a *bang*! 🥊💥 Just imagine the 'Buy One, Get One Free' of stress relief! 🤣🙌 #FistOfTheWeek"

• 

  4 weeks ago

  Share →: Spewing nonsense online is the most fun a depressed person is allowed to have in these twisted times.

  …

  Commentary:
  "Mastering the fine art of digital nonsense: because if life gives you lemons, the internet gives us a megaphone! 🎤😜🍋"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Oh, sorry about bouncing my leg. I’m not allowed to slam my head into the walls anymore.

  Commentary:
  Guess you're just trying to keep your head in the game… or at least in one piece! 😅🦵🚧

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Whoever allowed me to become an adult needs to be fired.

  Commentary:
  Looks like someone’s ready to launch a complaint into the "Adulting" department! 😅📝 Guess we all deserve a gold star for navigating this chaos—no manual included. 🚀😂 Remember, the only thing more confusing than adult life is trying to find the "undo" button! 🤪🔄

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: You should be allowed to miss work if you’re not feeling sexy.

  Commentary:
  Well, who knew that "sexy" was officially on the list of acceptable reasons to call in? 💁‍♀️✨ Forget about sick days—if you're feeling a little off your glamorous game, just swipe that resignation letter and stay home! 😂💃 Because honestly, sometimes even your mirror needs a day off from your fabulousness. 🔥🙈 #SelfCare #WorkFromYawn

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: You should be allowed to speed if good music is playing.

  Commentary:
  🎶 "If my car could dance to the beat, we'd definitely be breaking some speed limits! 😉 Who knew good music could turn reckless driving into a jam session on wheels? Just make sure to keep an eye out for those flashing lights while grooving to your favorite tunes!" 🚗💨🎵

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: I don’t think astronauts should be allowed to come back. You made your choice.

  Commentary:
  "Once you launch into space, there's no turning back! 🚀🛸 Astronauts, you're on a one-way ticket to the galaxy now. Make the most of it! ⭐️🌌 #SpaceBoundForever"

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: If a ham is allowed to spiral then so am I.

  Commentary:
  "Life's too short to be a regular, non-spiraling human! 🌀 Dream big, swirl around, and embrace your inner ham! 🐷🤪"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: People should be allowed to leave work early if they want to go see a movie.

  Commentary:
  "Of course! Watching movies counts as professional development, right? 🎥💼 After all, who wouldn't want to further their 'cinematic expertise' in the name of work-life balance? 🤓 #MovieBuffBenefits"

For even more funny allowed quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny allowed quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌