31 Funny amazing quotes

• It’s amazing how much I accomplish around the house right before someone is coming over.

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  4 weeks ago

  accomplish, amazing, around, before, cleaning, coming, house, housework, humor, i, motivation, much, over, preparation, procrastination, productivity, right, someone, visitor

• The human brain is amazing. It functions 24/7 from the day we’re born and only stops when you’re taking a test or speaking to someone attractive.

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  2 months ago

  amazing, attraction, attractive, born, brain, day, distraction, functions, human, human brain, humor, only, someone, speaking, taking, test, thinking

• We should be able to call in healthy: “I feel amazing today, and I’m not wasting it at work.”

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  2 months ago

  able, amazing, attitude, call, call in sick, feel, health, healthy, humor, i, motivation, productivity, should, sick, today, wasting, work

• I love eating fast food and getting big and fat. It’s amazing.

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  2 months ago

  activity, amazing, big, eating, fast, fast food, fat, food, fun, fun activity, getting, humor, i, indulgence, love, overweight, self-deprecating

• The key to looking amazing is looking like shit most of the time, so it’s more of a surprise.

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  2 months ago

  amazing, appearance, beauty, casual, confidence, humor, humorist, irony, key, looking, most, self-deprecation, shit, surprise, time

• It’s amazing how cats can ignore you with both ears.

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  2 months ago

  amazing, attitude, both, cat, cats, ears, humor, ignore, ignoring, pet

• Onesies are amazing till you have to really pee in the middle of the night then you question all your life’s decisions.

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  2 months ago

  amazing, clothing, comfort, decision, humor, life, life decision, night, onesy, pee, practicality, question, sleepwear, struggle

• Dogs will go through amazing effort to get a better view of your plate.

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  2 months ago

  amazing, animal, dog, effort, food, humor, pet, plate, view

• One day I’ll do amazing things. Today I’ll be satisfied if I don’t spill food on my lap.

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  2 months ago

  amazing, amazing thing, day, everyday, everyday life, expectation, food, goal, humor, lap, life, relatability, satisfaction, struggle, thing

• It’s amazing how music can transport you to another place. For example, this coffee shop is playing Justin Bieber, so I’m going to another restaurant.

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  2 months ago

  amazing, another, bieber, coffee, coffee shop, escape, example, funny situation, going, humor, justin, Justin Bieber, music, place, playing, restaurant, shop, situation, transport, transportation

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