73 Funny lot quotes

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  2 months ago

  Share →: This gratitude journal looks a lot like a grocery list.

  Commentary:
  When your gratitude journal ends up serving as your way to remember milk and eggs 🥛🍳—guess even gratitude has a shopping list now! 📝🛒 Talk about a grocery run for good vibes! 😄✨

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Being sober would be a lot easier if I liked myself.

  Commentary:
  "Trying to be sober when you don't even enjoy your own company is like a one-person party with no snacks 🎉🚫🍕 #SelfLoveStruggles"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: A lot of people think you need a lot of money to buy clothes. And they’re right.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs food and shelter when you can just wrap yourself in designer labels, right? 💸🛍️ #FashionOverFunction"

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: Choosing to ignore my strangely symbolic dream because I have a lot going on right now already.

  Commentary:
  "I guess you could say your dream symbolically represents your overwhelming to-do list… But who has time for dream analysis when you're already drowning in responsibilities? 🤷‍♂️💭 #DreamsCanWait"

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  4 months ago

  Share →: I’m capable of doing a lot of things but listening to people chew their food is not one of them.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the mighty power within us all – we can conquer mountains, slay dragons, but heaven forbid we sit through a symphony of chewing! 🙉🍽️ #SelectiveSuperpowers"

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  4 months ago

  Share →: I have a lot in common with AI. We occasionally provide incorrect information with a confident tone.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs accurate facts when you've got confidence, right? 🤖😂 Just call me Artificially Incorrect! 🤣"

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: You can learn a lot about a person by observing their every waking movement from a tree outside their house.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs a crystal ball when you have a tree outside someone's house to spy on them? 🌳👀 Nothing says 'neighborhood watch' quite like branching out into investigative tree work! 🕵️‍♂️ #TreePeeper"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Being an adult is realizing $1000 is little money to have, but a lot to owe.

  Commentary:
  "Adulting is like a twisted game of Monopoly – except instead of collecting $100, you're suddenly drowning in $1000 debt 🎲💸 #TheRealBoardGameOfLife"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: If liars’ pants really did catch on fire, watching the news would be a lot more fun.

  Commentary:
  "If liars' pants caught on fire, I bet the weather segment would be really hot 🔥👖😂 #FakeNewsFirestorm"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Two of the best things in life are laughing and orgasms. I want to make you do both a lot.

  Commentary:
  "Whoever said you can't have it all clearly hasn't met me 😏 Let's aim for a life filled with laughter and pleasure – it's all about that good vibe energy! 😂💥 #FunnyQuotes #LifeGoals"

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