154 Funny still quotes

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  4 months ago

  View →: Don’t give up, keep going. There are still so many disappointments waiting for you.
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  4 months ago

  View →: I’m not afraid of ghosts because everyone who’s mad at me is still alive.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Even when I look up the slang of today’s kids, I still have no idea what it means.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Ninety percent of my new follows are beautiful women, which tells me one thing: I’ve still got it!
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  4 months ago

  View →: I put my pants on like everyone else. With hope they still fit.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Those who still fit in their wedding dresses years later haven’t been making enough effort eating.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Telling your child their sibling is still asleep a very effective way to get them to practice their instrument.
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  4 months ago

  View →: I know everything is expensive right now, but just remember correcting people’s grammar online is still free.
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  4 months ago

  View →: As highly as it’s esteemed, the Mayo Clinic still sounds like the place sick sandwiches go to get better.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Netflix needs to stop asking if I’m still watching and start asking if I moved the laundry to the dryer yet.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Hey boy, are you my period? Because you’re annoying as hell but I still wanna see you regularly.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Crazy to think that even after all of these years the Titanic’s pool still has water in it.
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  4 months ago

  View →: There is still plenty of room in my heart, but the bouncer has become a little stricter in recent years.
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  4 months ago

  View →: How did they get kids to pose for oil paintings? Mine won’t sit still for 4 seconds for a family photo.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Is it still murder if they said, “Some other time,” but I thought they said smother time?
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  4 months ago

  View →: If a tree falls on your ex in the woods and no one’s around to hear it, you should probably still get rid of the chainsaw.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Changed my bio on bumble to “I’m gonna murder ur whole family” and guys still responded.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Pumpkin spice season comes earlier every year and yet some still deny climate change.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Incorrectly is the only word that, when spelled correctly, is still spelled incorrectly.
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  4 months ago

  View →: I have a lot to offer! Most of it’s bad, but it’s still a lot.
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  4 months ago

  View →: He’s making a list, he’s checking it twice, he’s leaving the store, he still forgot milk.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Sleeping in now means waking up without the alarm clock, but still at the same time.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Still writing the old year on all my ransom notes.
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  4 months ago

  View →: One year older today, and still no closer to growing up.
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  4 months ago

  View →: So apparently it’s still a DUI even if you’re the birthday boy.
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  4 months ago

  View →: When society eventually breaks down and we are left to rebuild civilization, I hope there are people who still know how to make cheese.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Maybe the reason Miss Piggy is still single is she has a fear of kermitment.
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  4 months ago

  View →: The main cause of immigration is we’re still a country where people want to go, but we’re working on fixing that.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Can someone please help me, I’m still at the Fyre Festival.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Middle children as adults still trying to get attention because the oldest is being dramatic and the younger child is getting away with everything.

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