Funny quotes bag

29 Funny bag quotes

If you wish me a happy Thanksgiving, don’t be surprised if I whip out a ziplock bag and ask you to bring me home some leftovers.

1 month ago

I may not have lost all my marbles yet, but there’s a small hole in the bag somewhere.

2 months ago

When I get filthy rich, I will stay humble by continuing to use grocery bags as bathroom trash bags.

2 months ago

So does everybody have a collection of grocery bags that you keep inside of a grocery bag?

2 months ago

My toxic trait is consistently cutting off the resealable part of the bag of frozen vegetables.

3 months ago

Did 900 crunches today. It was a bag of Cheetos, but still.

3 months ago

As I’m cleaning my room, this is a friendly reminder that you actually don’t need that free t-shirt or tote bag from that event.

3 months ago

Sometimes you just need to eat shredded cheese straight out of the bag.

3 months ago

I really miss my family… sized bag of crisps.

3 months ago

Snaccident: eating a whole bag of Doritos in one sitting.

3 months ago

Gonna break into your house, toast all your bread and put it back in the bag.

3 months ago

Bag of flesh that acts weird when another bag of flesh doesn’t send symbols on glowing screen.

3 months ago

Update on my fitness journey: My wife just handed me a bag of apples at the market and said, “careful, it’s heavy.”

3 months ago

My main career goal at the moment is to find a big bag of money in the woods.

3 months ago

I often choose gift bags instead of wrapping, not just out of laziness, but also because I have the fine motor skills of a drunken panda.

3 months ago

It’s awkward touching hands with another man inside a popcorn bag, especially if you don’t know the man and he doesn’t know you’re eating his popcorn.

3 months ago

Bob was hungry. He ripped open a new bag of tortillas only to discover a convenient, resealable opening on the other end.

3 months ago

I bought a bag of M&M’s and they don’t have M’s anymore. They all have W’s, for woke.

3 months ago

They should invent a self-checkout where someone else scans the items and puts them in a bag.

3 months ago

What do you mean a baguette isn’t a female bag?

3 months ago