50 Funny number quotes

• Libraries were a good start, but we really need to keep working on the number of places where people shouldn’t be allowed to talk.

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  4 weeks ago

  allowed, communication, control, etiquette, good, humor, keep, library, need, noise, noise control, number, people, places, public, public space, silence, social, social etiquette, space, start, talk, talking, where, working

• Answering your cell when you don’t recognize the number is like picking up a hitchhiker.

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  4 weeks ago

  answering, call, cell, cell phone, communication, hitchhiker, humor, joke, number, phone, phone call, picking, safety, stranger, unexpected, unexpected call, unknown, unknown number

• People who can’t tell the difference between whole numbers and decimals are missing the point.

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  4 weeks ago

  decimal, difference, humor, joke, math, math humor, missing, misunderstanding, number, numbers, people, point, pun, tell, whole, wordplay

• “I” before “E,” except when your foreign neighbor Keith receives eight counterfeit beige sleighs from weird, feisty, caffeinated weightlifters.

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  4 weeks ago

  before, caffeinated, caffeinated weightlifter, counterfeit, counterfeit sleigh, E, eight, except, feisty, foreign, foreign neighbor, i, keith, name, name Keith, neighbor, number, number eight, rule, sleigh, spelling, spelling rule, weightlifter, weird

• Asked a German girl for her number, and I’m still waiting for the rest of the digits. So far, all I have is “nine.”

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  4 weeks ago

  asked, cultural, dating, digits, German, girl, humor, i, joke, language, number, pun, rest, still, waiting

• Making a record-breaking number of bad choices today, I’m really proud of myself.

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  4 weeks ago

  bad, bad choice, bad decision, choice, choices, decision, humor, humorous, making, myself, number, pride, proud, record-breaking, sarcastic, self-deprecating, today

• The Scream movies were believable in the ’90s, but no one with any common sense answers unknown numbers on their phones anymore.

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  4 weeks ago

  90s, call, common, common sense, etiquette, horror, horror movy, humor, modern, modern technology, movy, number, numbers, phone, phone call, phone etiquette, phones, scream, sense, technology, unknown, unknown number

• If you only watched reality TV dating shows, you would probably estimate the number of people who work in medical device sales in the United States to be approximately 80,000,000.

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  4 weeks ago

  dating, dating show, device, entertainment, estimate, estimation, exaggeration, humor, medical, medical device sales, number, only, people, population, reality, reality TV, sales, satire, show, shows, states, TV, us, US population, work

• I need an app that deletes my number from other people’s phones.

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  4 weeks ago

  app, apps, digital, digital life, humor, i, life, media, need, number, phone, phones, privacy, social, social media, technology

• Unknown numbers will call me, then expect me to talk first. Welcome to the breathing competition.

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  4 weeks ago

  breathing, breathing competition, call, communication, competition, humor, interaction, me, number, numbers, patience, phone, phone call, sarcasm, social, social interaction, talk, unknown, unknown number, waiting, welcome

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