45 Funny shit quotes

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  3 weeks ago

  Share →: I wasn’t sure why the doctor prescribed LSD for my constipation, until I saw a dragon and shit myself.

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Some days you’re the shit and some days you’re the fan.

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: Started from the bottom and I’m still ain’t shit.

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: I think I’m emotionally constipated because I haven’t given a shit in months.

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: Your hoodie strings are uneven. Go home and get your shit together!

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: Does anyone know where I can get my shit together?

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: Thank God I have a cat. Who else is gonna shit in this box I have?

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: I’m going to be real pissed if I get my shit together and the world ends.

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: When Hulk wrecks shit he’s “incredible.” When I do it I’m “causing a scene” and “need to leave this place immediately.”

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: Wow, this person is full of shit. Oh, I’m on my own page.

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