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109 Funny us quotes

Funny us quotes are the perfect blend of wit and humor, guaranteed to tickle your funny bone ๐Ÿ˜‚! Whether you’re in need of a chuckle or a full-on belly laugh ๐Ÿคฃ, these quotes capture the essence of American humor with a playful twist. From classic one-liners to clever observations ๐Ÿ—จ๏ธ, they highlight the quirks and idiosyncrasies of everyday life in the USA ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ. Dive in and let the laughter begin! ๐ŸŽ‰

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Welcome to Wordgag! ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŒ๏ธ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ฅ

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I don’t usually think about what I say before I say it. I prefer to think about it after I’ve said it, late at night, for the rest of my life.

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Hey! Remember in the first grade when we were all just chilling and then some kid would throw up out of nowhere?

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I switched from coffee to orange juice and told my doctor I felt better. He said itโ€™s the vitamin C and natural sugars, but I think itโ€™s the vodka.

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I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

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During childbirth, women are in so much pain that it is almost possible for them to feel what men have to endure when they have a cold.

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Having your own apartment by yourself is so funny, cause I really just swept the whole place naked.

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โ€œIโ€™m doing better than my parents at my age. They had, like, no followers.โ€

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The one thing to know about me is I always get the last laugh. And oh yes, it’s maniacal.

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If someone steals your joke, you have to file a LOLsuit.

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Shooting a gun in the air to get everyone’s attention, then immediately getting shy and sheepishly twisting my shoe in the dirt and blinking bashfully.

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