101 Funny idea quotes

Trending Funny Idea Quotes 🔥

What no one tells you about having kids is that within a few years you’re in possession of a lot of teeth that you have no idea what to do with.
Feeling lonely? Just glue a coffee cup to the roof of your car. Everyone will wave to you.
I love when kids tell me what they want to be when they grow up, because I’m still looking for ideas.
First date idea: Couples Colonoscopies.
This year I’d like an advent calendar with 24 different tranquilizers.

More funny idea quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: Instead of renting an apartment, I’m going to save up for a lighthouse and go insane in it.

Commentary:
"Oh, the iconic lighthouse life! 🏠🤪 Who needs neighbors when you can have seagulls and solitude instead? 🌊 Just make sure you stock up on enough tea and books to keep your sanity afloat! ☕📚"
5 months ago
Share →: Pitching a sitcom where all the top people running a major city have been arrested and by chain of command the person in charge is now a librarian.

Commentary:
🤣🏙️ "In a world where chaos reigns and logic takes a backseat, welcome to 'The Dewey Decimated Decimal System'! Who needs mayors and governors when you have a librarian armed with overdue fines and shushing powers ready to bring order to the city? Tune in as our unlikely hero battles late fees and unruly citizens in this unforgettable sitcom where the only crime is not returning your books on time!" 📚🕶️
5 months ago
Share →: Even when I look up the slang of today’s kids, I still have no idea what it means.

Commentary:
"Trying to decipher today's slang is like trying to solve a cryptic puzzle designed by aliens 👽. You're not alone in feeling lost in this linguistic maze! It's a wild ride in the world of Gen Z lingo 🤯🤔 #LostInTranslation"
5 months ago
Share →: Hear me out, a Q-Tip that doesn’t bounce out the trash can when you throw it away.

Commentary:
"Finally, a Q-Tip that sticks to the plan and doesn't bounce away like a rebellious basketball! 🏀🙉 Say goodbye to the great escape – Trash cans everywhere are breathing a sigh of relief! 🗑️😆"
5 months ago
Share →: My boss wants me to train some other employees so it’s pretty obvious he has no idea I am completely incompetent.

Commentary:
"Oh the irony! 🤣 Training others when you yourself are unsure of what you're doing sounds like a recipe for office comedy! 🤷‍♂️ Who knows, maybe your boss thinks your incompetence adds a special 'charm' to the training sessions! 😄 #FakeItTillYouMakeIt"
5 months ago
Share →: I hate when people ask me what I meant by something. Listen, I have no idea. I’m as confused here as you are. We’re both learning what I’m about to say at the exact same time.

Commentary:
"Communication is like a rollercoaster ride with me – buckle up and hold on tight because even I don't know where this sentence is going! 🎢😂 Let's embark on this wild linguistic journey together, discovering the meaning as it unfolds! 🤔🎉"
5 months ago
Share →: When I’m president, I will add an additional hour between 6 and 7pm.

Commentary:
"Breaking News: Future president plans to bend time! 🌀⏳ Say goodbye to rush hour traffic and hello to 'Happy Hour, Part 2'! 🍸🎉 Who needs a TARDIS when we've got a president with time-bending powers? ⏰🇺🇸 #PresidentialPriorities"
5 months ago
Share →: I find it hard to believe I used to just answer my phone when it rang. No caller ID. No idea who was calling. Just picked it up and said “hello” like a goddam daredevil.

Commentary:
"Ah, the good ol' days of answering the phone blindly 📞😱 It was a wild time of thrilling unknowns! Ring, ring – cue the daredevil 'hello' 😆 Who needs caller ID when you've got nerves of steel? 🦸‍♂️💥 #BraveAnsweringSkills"
5 months ago
Share →: “No idea” doesn’t mean I don’t know the answer. I just don’t want to have a conversation.

Commentary:
"Oh, the classic 'no idea' defense strategy – a stellar way to avoid small talk and awkward social interactions without coming off as completely clueless! 😏🤷‍♂️ Who knew being vague could be such a power move?💡"
5 months ago
Share →: Tattoo idea for men: spider webs in the corners of the receding hairline.

Commentary:
"Who needs a comb-over when you can have a web-over? 🕷️💇‍♂️ Just remember, with great receding hairlines comes great responsibility to rock that spider web tattoo! 😉 #BadHairDayGoneGood"

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