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31 Funny dead quotes

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My love language is deader than Latin.
Most people think that T-Rexes can’t clap because they have short arms, but really it’s because they are dead.
Some people you look at or hear talking and think to yourself, the wheel may be turning, but the hamster is dead.
A bird just flew into our glass door. Іt’s not dead. Just really embarrassed.
My main takeaway from ‘The Walking Dead’ is that you can still eat the expired canned goods in your pantry.

New funny dead quotes 👇

3 days ago
Share →: I was guest-starring on The Love Boat when you woke me up. You’re dead to me.

Commentary:
"Interrupt my cruise again and I'll toss you overboard! 🚢😴☠️"
1 month ago
Share →: Roses are red, I’m staying in bed. I’ve made no plans, besides pretending I’m dead.

Commentary:
"Perfect plan, unless my bed wants to start a conspiracy against me! 😴🛏️🔍"
2 months ago
Share →: My only plan for this weekend is to move just enough so the people don’t think I’m dead.

Commentary:
"Weekend goals: mastering the art of 'I swear I'm alive' maneuvers! 🛋️😴💃"
3 months ago
Share →: I thought there was a spider on the rug but it was just yarn. It’s dead yarn now though.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic case of mistaken identity – spider or yarn, the struggle is real! 🕷️🧶 May the yarn rest in peace – or should we say, rest in threads? 😄"
4 months ago
Share →: Most people think that T-Rexes can’t clap because they have short arms, but really it’s because they are dead.

Commentary:
Oh, poor T-Rexes, they just can't catch a break! 🦖😂 It turns out, it's not their tiny arms but their lack of a pulse causing the lack of applause. 💀👏 Just imagine a paleontologist arranging a fossilized T-Rex skeleton for an encore. Keep the spirit alive, quite literally! 🦴🎉
4 months ago
Share →: My love language is deader than Latin.

Commentary:
"Ah, the rare and ancient love language of the extinct, the lost art of romancing like Caesar himself. If only we could revive it, maybe then we'd have a chance at deciphering those cryptic texts from our partners. Alas, it seems our love lives are doomed to remain as mysterious as a Latin inscription on a crumbling Roman ruin."
4 months ago
Share →: Does anyone else stare at the dead body in movies to see if you can catch them breathing?

Commentary:
"Ah, the ultimate movie-watching challenge: playing detective to catch those pesky breathing actors in action! Who knew being nosy could be so morbidly entertaining?"
5 months ago
Share →: A bird just flew into our glass door. Іt’s not dead. Just really embarrassed.

Commentary:
Oh no, poor bird! 🐦 At least it’s still alive, even if its pride took a little hit. It’s probably hoping none of the other birds saw the clumsy mishap! 🙈 Next time, perhaps the bird should invest in some dark shades for that fancy glass door runway! 😎 #BirdsWithoutBoundaries
5 months ago
Share →: I’m only dead on the outside.

Commentary:
"Well, you know what they say – it's what's on the inside that counts! 💀😂 But hey, at least you're keeping it lively on the exterior! 🌟 #UndeadAndProud"
5 months ago
Share →: Unless you’re dead wearing a sheet, you got no business ghosting people.

Commentary:
👻💬 "Unless you’re haunting a haunted house as a ghost, you really shouldn't be ghosting people in real life! 👻✨ Stay visible and communicative, folks! Who you gonna call? Not the ghostbusters, that's for sure! 😂📞" 🚫👻 #CommunicationIsKey #NoGhostingAllowed