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35 Funny clean quotes

Trending Funny Clean Quotes 🔥

Never mind a Roomba, I need a robot garbage can that will follow my kids around the house all day.
If you’re gonna spend so much time in my head, would it kill you to tidy up a bit?
Dear ghosts, if you can move stuff around and flicker lights, then you can use a mop.
If I’d married a wealthier man, I’d be lying on a fancier couch right now refusing to clean bigger rooms.
I went to clean bathroom and I’m 99% sure my kids shoot their toothpaste out of a cannon.

More funny clean quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: I showered with my boyfriend. My breasts have never been so clean! Wow!

Commentary:
"Who needs soap when you have a boyfriend, right? 😆🚿 Apparently, love really is the best cleanser! #RelationshipGoals"
5 months ago
Share →: Forgetting how to clean the dishes and shooting them with a gun.

Commentary:
"Who knew doing the dishes could turn into a way more exciting task 🍽️🔫 Some might say this method adds a whole new level of 'dish cleaning' efficiency! 💥😄 #InnovativeHousekeeping"
5 months ago
Share →: I tried to clean up my Chrome tabs but it turns out all 200 of them contain information that is vital for my survival.

Commentary:
Oh, the classic case of tab hoarding – a survival strategy in the digital age! 🦸‍♂️ Who knew that an overload of Chrome tabs could be essential for our very existence? 🚀 With 200 tabs full of crucial data, you might just hold the key to knowledge that could save the world! 🌎💻 Now, that's what we call multitasking to the extreme! 🤯 #TabTales
5 months ago
Share →: The echo in my house when it’s clean is unsettling. Better order more stuff.

Commentary:
"Cleaning spotlight: when you can literally hear your own thoughts bouncing off the walls! 🧹✨ Time to amp up the clutter and restore peace to your ears. 🎶🏡 #EchoesOfCleanliness"
5 months ago
Share →: My kids had to work extra hard this morning but they were able to get the clean house back to it’s normal messy state just in time for the guests to arrive.

Commentary:
Looks like the kids mastered the art of creating controlled chaos! 🌀🧹 No guest would ever suspect their incredible speed in restoring the house back to its true form – a beautifully messy masterpiece! 🤹‍♂️🎉
5 months ago
Share →: A freshly cleaned bathroom triggers an irresistible urge in men to trim their beard.

Commentary:
"Who knew a sparkling bathroom could be the secret to a well-groomed beard? 💈🚽 Cleanliness is truly the unsung hero of male grooming routines! Just don't blame the beard for clogging the drain 😅 #BathroomMagic"
5 months ago
Share →: Dear ghosts, if you can move stuff around and flicker lights, then you can use a mop.

Commentary:
"Oh, dear ghosts, no need to be just lazy specters – put those supernatural skills to good use and help with the cleaning! 👻🧹 Who knew haunting could include some housekeeping duties! 😄"
5 months ago
Share →: One day my kids will move out and discover the dishes don’t clean themselves and I feel for them. I really do.

Commentary:
"Ah, the harsh reality of adulting hitting our kids like a ton of dirty dishes 🍽️😅 Parenting is all fun and games until someone has to do the dishes! #TheStruggleIsReal"
5 months ago
Share →: I’m implementing a new policy in my house: any child who is awake past bedtime can either go to sleep or clean the house, no exceptions.

Commentary:
"Looks like the kids have a tough choice to make – doze off peacefully or face the daunting task of cleaning up! 😂🕰️🌙 Better hit the sack before the vacuum cleaner hits back! 🛏️✨ #ParentingDilemmas"
5 months ago
Share →: I went to clean bathroom and I’m 99% sure my kids shoot their toothpaste out of a cannon.

Commentary:
🤣 Sounds like your bathroom is hosting a secret toothpaste Olympics! 🦷💥 Who needs a toothbrush when you've got toothpaste cannons in the house? Watch out for those little toothpaste snipers! 🔫😆 #KidsWillBeKids