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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

Even worse than a spider is a spider that just disappeared.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

Today sucked so bad, I had to stop by the liquor store on my way to the bar.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

I’ve been blocked by better.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

Follow your heart, but take your brain with you.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

I have a great poker face because I have no idea what’s going on.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

“AI is coming for your jobs”. I’d like to see AI show up drunk on Fridays and sexually harass my coworkers.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

Automated phone system: To speak to a representative, please enter the first twelve digits of pi.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

I do block people right away; you’re not going to stress me out on my own phone, with my own internet, and in my own house.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

Wisdom of the day: Don’t do anything you don’t want to explain to the paramedic.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

When people talk about enriching their lives, I assume they’ve found a way to add more cheese.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

763 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,925

Funny Quotes Topics

13,894

Funny Quotes Images

10,925

41 minutes ago

3,440

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on YouTube:

People always tell me I’d be “late to my own funeral” like it’s a bad thing. They’d be lucky if I even showed up to that depressing shit.

Going viral on YouTube:

Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, “Oh no, it’s a cop”?

Live now on X:

The word synergy sounds like a mix of the words sin and energy. Like, to be debauched but to do it with flair and zest.

Spotted on Discord:

“Well, at least things can’t get any worse” has turned out to be a failure of my imagination.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

No, I didn’t eat enough protein today, but I did think of you with enough intensity to generate new muscle tissue in my heart.

Spotted on Discord:

I’m not lazy. I just give my couch the love it deserves.

Trending via Twitch:

A Monday every week is excessive.

Trending via Reddit:

The best part of the relationship is before you meet them, and you’re single.

Just shared via Twitch:

I am crumbling under the tyranny of constantly needing to ‘Create an Account’.

Just shared via Slack:

People believe that they have brains but maybe that’s just inside their heads.

Home » Funny Stuff Quotes

55 Funny stuff quotes

Funny stuff quotes 😂 are the little gems that sprinkle humor into our daily lives! Whether you’re having a gloomy day or just need a good laugh, these witty lines can turn any frown upside down 😄. From clever wordplay to hilarious observations about life, they never fail to tickle our funny bones 🤪. So dive into the world of humor, where every quote is a giggle waiting to happen, and let the laughs roll in! 🎉

New funny stuff quotes 👇

1 day ago
Share →: Forget all this adulting stuff, let’s bring back Saturday morning cartoons.

Commentary:
Who needs bills and responsibilities when you can have cereal marathons and animated adventures? 😂📺🎉
4 days ago
Share →: Cool things happen when you start hanging out outside a lot. Animals just appear and stuff.

Commentary:
Sounds like my social life—suddenly I'm surrounded by squirrels instead of humans! 🐿️🌳😄
5 days ago
Share →: I love reading a menu. Look at all this stuff I want to eat.

Commentary:
This menu is like a scroll of delicious life goals! 😋📜
6 days ago
Share →: Why can’t they use deep fake technology for good instead of evil? Like taking Zoom meetings for you, stuff like that.

Commentary:
Finally, a use for deep fake technology that saves us from the 'Can you hear me now?' struggle! 🤔🤖💼
6 days ago
Share →: People will say stuff like “Well, at least if WWIII happens, I won’t have to go to work…” I think in your heart you know that’s not true.

Commentary:
So true! Because my boss would probably send an email saying, "Good news! We've transitioned to remote work… indefinitely! 😊💼💣"
6 days ago
Share →: If elves make shoes, cookies, and toys, why don’t we put them in charge of more stuff?

Commentary:
Why stop at shoes, cookies, and toys? Let's put them in charge of everything—maybe we'll finally get free cookies with every shoe purchase and toys that assemble themselves! 🍪👠🎁
1 week ago
Share →: Feelings are like children. You don’t want them driving the car, but you shouldn’t stuff them in the trunk either.

Commentary:
"Steering the wheel is for grown-ups, but at least the backseat is a safe space! 😂🚗🧸"
1 week ago
Share →: I’m thinking stuff like “yeah” and also stuff like “yup.”

Commentary:
"Ah, the profound thoughts of a great philosopher: 'Yeah' and 'Yup' 😂🧠💭 #DeepThoughts"
1 month ago
Share →: I can’t blame this generation too much for doing stupid stuff. My generation thought seven Police Academy movies were a good idea.

Commentary:
"😂 Who knew our biggest crime would be watching all seven? 🚔🎬 #TimelessMistakes"
1 month ago
Share →: Is ChatGPT my father-in-law because it keeps making stuff up and passing it off as fact?

Commentary:
"Guess I should start calling it DadGPT! 😂👨‍💼🤦‍♂️"

For even more funny stuff quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny stuff quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

763 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,925

Funny Quotes Topics

13,894

Funny Quotes Images

10,925

41 minutes ago

3,421

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

How dare my boss set up a meeting for the time I sneak off early?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

Jewelry stores should just be like: Whether you’re trying to be nice or trying to get laid, we got you covered.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

Get a puppy if you are in the market for a best friend who gets you up early so she can bite you excitedly.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

Your fingers have fingertips, but your toes don’t have toetips. Yet, you can tiptoe but not tipfinger.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

My ideal workday would be from 9:00 AM to 9:07 AM

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

Therapy isn’t enough. I need to run my brain through the dishwasher.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

Daniel Craig leaving Bond to become Benoit Blanc is one of the best things to ever happen.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

That moment you turn down the music while driving around looking for a street address, so you can see better.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

Everybody looks like a criminal on the self-checkout camera.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

Sometimes a girl has to delete all the apps on her phone and not speak to anyone for a week to find true happiness.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on X:

Broke my work phone. I can’t talk on it anymore. I should have done this a long time ago.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I didn’t lose a girlfriend, I gained an enemy.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Alcohol is a vicious cycle: regret, recovery, repeat.

Going viral on Telegram:

The worst thing I’ve seen as a paramedic is my paycheck.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Sorry I’m late. The door said PULL, but I don’t believe everything I read.

Reported on Slack:

Maybe coffee is addicted to me?

Spotted on Discord:

Memories are a bit fuzzy – but regrets? They’re in 8K and Dolby Vision.

Making waves on Discord:

Parallel lines have got so much in common, it’s a shame they’ll never meet.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

I believe my ex-wife is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

Going viral on Discord:

Disney set unrealistic standards of how often woodland creatures would help me clean and do laundry if I just sang out my window.

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