75 Funny saying quotes

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  3 weeks ago

  View →: One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re saying, “What kind of trees are those?”
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  3 weeks ago

  View →: Money talks, and also waves goodbye.
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  4 weeks ago

  View →: I went for an interview at IKEA. The manager greeted me by saying “come in, make a seat”.
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  1 month ago

  View →: Making eye contact with strangers on the sidewalk and saying “it’s crazy that they just let me walk around, haha”.
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  1 month ago

  View →: Parents saying “I know my child” will forever be the funniest joke.
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  1 month ago

  View →: Uh oh, said somethin’ weird. Better fix it by saying something even weirder.
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  2 months ago

  View →: I love saying “why would I lie” when I’m lying.
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  2 months ago

  View →: Girls don’t actually shop. We just walk round touching the clothes saying ‘this is cute’.
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  3 months ago

  View →: I hate the saying: “Get up, the sun is shining!” What am I supposed to do? Photosynthesis?
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  3 months ago

  View →: I end all my sentences with “Just saying..” because ending them with “You bonehead..” would probably be considered offensive.
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  3 months ago

  View →: I cannot hear a word you are saying if your hoodie strings are uneven.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Welcome to your 40’s: it’s ten years of people saying “wait until you’re 50”.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Saying “Hmmmm” when my boss walks in so he knows I’m thinking about stuff.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Adulthood is saying “but after this week things will slow down a bit” over and over until you die.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Instead of saying “Good morning,” my wife and I go straight into explanations of how badly we each slept.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Saying “shut up” before skipping the YouTube ad is literally necessary.
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  4 months ago

  View →: All I’m saying is that big burgers should be wider not taller.
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  4 months ago

  View →: I love saying “exactly” to stuff that doesn’t make sense.
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  4 months ago

  View →: All I’m saying is that at first I am shy and then I become a podcast.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Lasagna has never broken my heart. Just saying.
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  4 months ago

  View →: One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re saying things like, “That’s a pretty building.”
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  4 months ago

  View →: Normalize ending a hang-out abruptly by saying ‘I wanna go home now’ and then going home.
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  4 months ago

  View →: If I don’t text you saying Happy New Year, we still gang, I’m just lazy.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Someone was saying that social media makes you miss out on your real life, but have you seen real life?
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  4 months ago

  View →: Sorry, my face wasn’t created to hide that much distain for what you’re saying.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Babysitting a pair of twin babies right now and feeding them saying “here comes the airplane”. I don’t know, just feels weird.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Hey, I noticed you’re not saying what I want.
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  4 months ago

  View →: I love when I get an email from a brand saying “we miss you!” with no coupon attached. Babe, a lot of people miss me, let’s be competitive here.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Starting conversations with short people by saying “back when I was your height…”
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  4 months ago

  View →: I’m not saying I’m messy, but if Copperfield knew what I can make disappear, he’d be jealous.

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