50 Funny event quotes

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  4 months ago

  View →: “23 and Me” is how Leonardo DiCaprio RSVPs for events.
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  4 months ago

  View →: My husband cleaned the kitchen for the first time in years. He’s in the living room, dressed in a suit, waiting for the award ceremony to commence.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Can someone please help me, I’m still at the Fyre Festival.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Anytime someone throws a Great Gatsby themed party, I have to assume they never finished the book.
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  4 months ago

  View →: It’s called a “sports car” because getting out of one after 40 is a physical event.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Me, at the intervention: “Ah look, all the reasons I drink gathered in one place.”
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  4 months ago

  View →: They should combine the running of the bulls with Tour de France next year.
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  4 months ago

  View →: People who own banana costumes will wear that shit to anything.
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  5 months ago

  View →: It’s called the Summer Olympics so one of the events should be running in flip flops to catch the ice cream man.
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  5 months ago

  View →: When the Olympics finally introduces the event “Dropping your phone and very nearly catching it but not quite” then you’ll all see me shine.
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  5 months ago

  View →: This is not an empty room, this is a very successful anti-party.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Everyone is gangster until they’re asked to reveal a “fun fact” about themself as part of a work event icebreaker.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Don’t invite me places. I was cesarean. I didn’t want to come out then and I certainly don’t want to now.
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  5 months ago

  View →: People keep inviting me to stuff. I miss the pandemic.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Imagine the carnage at an IKEA team building event.
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  5 months ago

  View →: The rule should be: if you can smell the cookout, you’re invited to the cookout.
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  5 months ago

  View →: This could have been an email. Me, while attending a wedding ceremony.
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  5 months ago

  View →: I hope you catch the bouquet at my funeral.
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  5 months ago

  View →: I wasn’t planning on moving, but I was just invited to the neighborhood fall potluck, so I guess now I have no choice.
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  5 months ago

  View →: I never get as envious of parents as I do when their baby starts crying and they get to leave the event.

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