Not me out here checking the growth progress of my potted flowers only a couple hours after I planted the seeds in the first place. Posted on14 hours ago
I’m really looking forward to getting a full 8 hours of overthinking in tonight. Posted on14 hours ago
Do you think I’ll read a book again at some point or will I continue to dumb myself down with 12 hours of screen time? Posted on20 hours ago
My 3 weeks without sweets were over after 12 hours. Proof that time runs faster with increasing age. Posted on1 day ago
Your girlfriend needs two hours to get ready. But if you don’t have your shoes on when she’s ready, you’re the problem. Posted on1 day ago
Tears for Fears: Everybody wants to rule the world. Me: Some of us just want eight hours of uninterrupted sleep. Posted on1 day ago
The 10 minutes I spend on my mobile before I go to sleep are the best 3 hours of my day. Posted on1 day ago
Nothing guarantees running into someone you know in public better than looking like a feral animal on two hours of sleep. Posted on3 days ago
Yeah, baby, I am an animal in bed. More specifically a koala. I can sleep for 22 hours a day. Posted on3 days ago
Start each day with a positive thought, like: “I can go back to bed in just 17 short hours.” Posted on3 days ago
They say time is the solution to every problem. I’ve been waiting for five hours already and the room is still messy. Posted on3 days ago
I don’t know why everyone wants love like in the movies. A movie is only 2 hours. Posted on3 days ago
Life hack: give yourself 8 to 12 hours of alone time in the morning to mentally prepare for the day. Posted on3 days ago