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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

We’re all just a bunch of addicts, struggling with our drug of choice.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

You can never really “own” earbuds. You just have to appreciate the time you had together.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

Salt is just angry sugar.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

I shall have another coffee, for I am sleeping standing.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

I know everything is expensive right now, but just remember correcting people’s grammar online is still free.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

What no one tells you about having kids is that within a few years you’re in possession of a lot of teeth that you have no idea what to do with.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

I want my name to come up when you go to confession.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

Canadian Thanksgiving isn’t the same day as Thanksgiving in the US because Canadians already put gravy on everything every day.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

Babe, wake up, it’s stupid outside!

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

Tinder is a food delivery app if you’re good at it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1747 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,909

Funny Quotes Topics

14,725

Funny Quotes Images

11,909

5 minutes ago

3,429

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

To the guy who invented zero, thanks for nothing.

Just landed via Messenger:

Due to inflation, a picture is now worth 2300 words.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Her idea of a romantic setting is one that has a diamond in it.

Reported on Reddit:

Not sure if “life hack” exactly, but I fell down the stairs and now my whole family is being so nice and catering to my needs.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

It’s so important to warm up before any physical activity, like getting out of bed.

Reported on Reddit:

Lou Read is the name of my favorite musician and also the book I keep in the toilet.

Spotted on Threads:

I like to stay grounded by keeping the weight of the world on my shoulders.

Trending via WeChat:

Am I finishing my education or is my education finishing me?

Breaking via Threads:

Kind of rude you didn’t wake me up before you went went.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

They say you should dress for the job you want then send you home as “the stormtrooper suit is not appropriate work attire”.

Home » Funny Hours Quotes

82 Funny hours quotes

Funny hours quotes⏰ bring a chuckle to mundane moments, adding a playful twist to your day! 😂 Whether you’re an early bird catching the worm or a night owl hooting at midnight, these witty sayings tickle the funny bone of timekeepers everywhere. From coffee-fueled mornings☕ to late-night brainstorms🌙, there’s always a perfect quote to match your mood. Dive in and let these humorous tidbits brighten your clock-watching moments! 🕒

New funny hours quotes 👇

6 hours ago
Share →: Just worked out for 2 hours straight and 1 hour gay.

Commentary:
Didn't know my workout playlist could change my orientation! 🎶🏋️‍♂️🌈
8 hours ago
Share →: Shoutout to Netflix for being the only one that checks in on me every few hours. “Are you still watching?” Yeah, babe, thank you for asking.

Commentary:
Netflix: the only friend who judges my life choices but stays for the binge 🍿📺😊
21 hours ago
Share →: If my house is clean, just know I yelled at everyone for two hours first.

Commentary:
Cleaning tip: Achieve a spotless house with the power of your vocal cords! 🗣️🏠✨
1 day ago
Share →: I don’t want to sleep like a baby, I want to sleep like a cat. 14 hours, no responsibilities, zero regrets.

Commentary:
Dream goal: mastering the art of the purr-fect nap 😺💤 Zero stress, just whisker bliss!
2 days ago
Share →: How I clean my room: 1. Start in one corner. 2. Find something from six years ago and stare at it nostalgically for five hours. 3. Go to bed.

Commentary:
Sounds like my room cleaning plan too: step 4, wake up surrounded by "important" treasures! 🕰️🛏️😅
2 days ago
Share →: Sometimes you show up to work, and they just torture you for hours.

Commentary:
When I signed up for this job, I didn’t realize I’d be joining a circus as the main act! 🎪🤡📞
3 days ago
Share →: Your woman will take 2 hours to get ready, but if you don’t have your shoes on when she is ready, you’re the problem.

Commentary:
When she finally says she's ready and you get called out for needing 30 seconds to find your shoes: "Blink twice and I'm already behind schedule! 👠⏰😅"
3 days ago
Share →: You can say “Have a nice day,” no problem, but saying “Enjoy the next 24 hours” sounds vaguely threatening.

Commentary:
😂 "Next time my barista tells me to 'enjoy the next 24 hours,' I'm ordering my coffee with a side of panic! ☕😅🚨"
4 days ago
Share →: Cooking your own meals really is the best way to devote 50 hours of your life every month to save $50.

Commentary:
Who knew being my own chef would make me a master at converting hours into cents! 🍳⏳💰
4 days ago
Share →: Lois Lane said, “Clark?” like she didn’t just make out with that same jawline in spandex twelve hours ago.

Commentary:
Clearly, Lois needs to schedule an eye exam. 🦸‍♂️👓💋

For even more funny hours quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny hours quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1747 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,909

Funny Quotes Topics

14,725

Funny Quotes Images

11,909

5 minutes ago

3,446

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

The real challenge of adulthood is figuring out what to eat every day.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Always remember you’re someone’s reason to smile. Because you’re a joke.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

Are you spaghetti because I want you to meat my balls?

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

Tidying up usually ends up with you sitting somewhere and playing around with things you found while tidying up.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

Failed relationships can be described as so much wasted make-up.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

And then there are those dates after which you think: “Have I really shaved my legs for this?”

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

The secret to a clean home? Never let your husband or children in.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Being loved right feels like telepathy and a little bit of witchcraft.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

My hair will never allow me to commit any crime; I leave my DNA everywhere.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

I like my coffee so strong that it wakes up the neighbors.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Messenger:

Thank you for contacting the abyss. Your scream is very important to us.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

If GPT-5 will have ‘Ph.D.-level intelligence’, then GPT-6 will have the intelligence of someone who decided not to get a PhD.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Sometimes I just want someone to hug me and say “I know it’s hard, but you’ll be okay. Here’s a coffee and a million dollars.”

Shared recently on WeChat:

My girlfriend treats me like a god. She ignores my existence and only talks to me when she needs something.

Just landed via Slack:

At this point, if you buy Tesla, everyone is just going to assume you are a loser.

Spotted on Slack:

Do you guys remember when we had to share one desktop computer wіth the whole famіly?

Making waves on Telegram:

You know you’re mature when you go to the dentist and you are no longer afraid of pain, but of how much it costs.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

I think the real reason this generation is so angry is that their music sucks.

Seen just now on Threads:

I was very disappointed when I found out drinking alcohol doesn’t actually kill brain cells, I was hoping to join a political party one day.

Breaking via Discord:

If you want to impress me with your car, it better be a food truck.

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